An article in the paper last Sunday written by a high profile Mummy blogger has had me thinking since reading it...this particular Mummy chose to utilise the precious entire page in one of the most popular forms of media she has been blessed with to reveal and justify her dislike of playing with her own children. At first I thought perhaps it was a little tongue in cheek, a bit of fun and poke at her own lack of patience however on further thought I have realised that we all have different perceptions of how we define quality time.
The photos above were taken today of Mini G in the kitchen helping me bake cupcakes this afternoon...over the last 36 hours this was the most energetic activity we shared. Amongst other things we paddled in the wading pool, constructed several different Duplo farmhouses, enjoyed each meal together, cuddled on the loungeroom floor, played a memory game, relaxed in the bath, read many books and generally just enjoyed each others company, in the true sense of the word.
Mini G is not quite at the 'game playing' age, however many of the things we do together are unstructured play and involve a lot of sitting, BEING and playing. Prior to Motherhood I was very bad at just sitting, breastfeeding was the first experience of my life that allowed me to SIT and BE without the overwhelming desire to get up and clean something! To be honest it took me many months to surrender to the power of the breastfeeding and its massive life lesson.
Playing with our precious little souls, whether it be structured or free form is of HUGE importance to their development in so many ways. In my mind it is also of HUGE importance to their sense of importance, their sense of our commitment to them. I suspect that even ten minutes of our time is actually equivalent to hours in their minds. Surely we can all commit to a few of these irreplaceable sessions of play without the need to attend to other things, what is more important?
Yes we have busy lives, busier than ever according to the media! The demands on our time are huge and there is more pressure to achieve as Mothers than there was for other generations...is this really the case though? Perhaps as a naturally organised person I am able to ensure that there is ALWAYS time to play with the little life that I willingly bought into this world. Is Motherhood not about nurturing, placing the absolute importance of our roles before anything else?
How do you define quality time with your children?
I like your post and absolutely agree. There MUST always be time for our children.
ReplyDeleteIf we don't give them the time and attention when they are little, there is no point wondering 'how come we don't know anything about our teenagers' later on...
To me quality time is anything you do together and enjoy it! For example today we made animals from big lego blocks and played zoo. Ask me, ask my 2 1/2 or 5 1/2 year olds - WE HAD FUN! Simple, enjoyable and 100% there.
Nice blog - I'll be back.
I've been reading your blog for a little while now and I really enjoy and admire your honesty, passion and commitment. Time is such a precious thing and I too agree that quality time with our munchkins is irreplaceable.
ReplyDeleteFor me though, my life has been about too much time with them and not enough time away from them. I have a two year old and a nine month old. Both of whom I love, cherish and adore. However, like you, Lisa, I found it difficult to sit still before I became a mother and breastfeeding helped me learn to sit and appreciate. Motherhood has been a total whirl-wind adventure! And having my bubbas 16 months apart only exacerbated it!
Lately, I have really begun to notice that I am often overwhelmed with frustration and a yearning for my life before children. I am reassessing my life and what I need to keep it balanced - for me and my children.
I spent four hours away from my children yesterday and the time I spent chatting, reading, singing and playing with them when I returned home was intensely enjoyable! I felt quality time again. Something I have been taking for granted or have been unable to partake in.
I have realised that absence is what I need to make my heart grow fonder.
I'm looking forward to working outside of our home again (part-time) and feeling a yearning to spend time with my babies and for us all to enjoy each others company, learning and growing together.
Thanks for your blog! It is greatly appreciated.
Natika